Self confidence is not something that holds me back, in fact I really appreciate the level of confidence I enjoy and feel that I can make the choices and decisions I want without a feeling of concern or over riding fear. That is not to say that I am always successful, but I realise that even by trying I am moving closer to a higher level of confidence.
I did not always have a high level of self confidence. When I was younger, I had a lot of self confidence in my ability to do well in basketball and athletics, but my confidence in my ability to deal with life’s challenges was quite low. This was probably caused by a fear of not measuring up to my parent’s expectations and a little bit of social shyness. However, as I got older, I realised that my parents only wanted me to be healthy and to try my best at everything I did. As a member of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, I had a lot of social interaction with people from all walks of life and I lost most of my shyness. My job also required that I respond to all different kinds of situations. The more success I had, the more my self confidence rose.
Self confidence or confidence in yourself means that you know that you can do whatever task you are faced with. This does not mean that you have to do every task by yourself. It means that the ones you know you can do by yourself you do and the ones where you need help you know how to find it. Confidence is a learned trait, not something you are born with. It is the force which pushes you forward and allows you to find the right path amidst the confusion and chaos of life. Confidence is the necessity you must have to assist you in realising your dreams and goals.
We all have the power of self confidence within us. Sadly many leave it unused for long periods of time while others use it sparingly like a miser. Forget about past worries and build the power of self confidence within you. Since you can’t change the mistakes of the past, don’t let them spoil the present or dim the future.
The first thing that you must practice is “don’t hate yourself” before deciding to practice self confidence. It is very difficult to become self confident if you do not like yourself. Remember, just like everyone else, you were born into this world for a specific reason. Think about the things that you are good at doing. Work at becoming better at them. Don’t worry about the things that you are not very good at. As a very successful person I was talking to recently said, “Why spend your limited time here on earth working on things you are not good at. Instead perfect the things you are good at and hire someone to do the things you are not good at.”
Mediocrity and poor performance are often due to low self confidence but it is not something you have to live with. You can build your self confidence by challenging yourself to take action and do something. Even though you feel as if you lack confidence, it doesn’t mean other people can tell. Building good self confidence is a wonderful thing, and it’s much easier than you’d imagine. One of the easiest ways of building self confidence is to “take baby steps.” What I mean by this is to set small goals or projects that you have to complete. Each time you do one in the time you have set for yourself, you will build your self confidence. The accumulation of small “victories” will convince your subconscious mind that you can do what you set out to do. It will then convince your conscious mind that you have a lot of capabilities and your self confidence will grow. If you continue to do this over a period of months, you will find that your self confidence becomes greatly improved. With improved self confidence you can take on bigger projects and goals and as these are completed your self confidence will grow by leaps and bounds.
So what other techniques are available to anyone wishing to develop more self confidence? It should be no surprise to you when I tell you that the single most influential person on your self confidence is you, or more specifically, your mind. This probably sounds very basic but are you using your own thoughts to reenforce your self confidence and self esteem? Talk positively to yourself all the time. Become your own best friend and supporter. Encourage yourself to do more. Congratulate yourself on every small or large victory. Remember that very few people are successful the first time they try to do something. You didn’t ride a bike the first time you tried. Thomas Edison didn’t invent the light bulb on his first attempt either. It took him more than 10,000 attempts before he made the first successful light bulb and it only lasted a few minutes. The biggest thing to remember is that you are never defeated in doing anything you want to do until you quit. Donald Trump, during a recent interview, stated that he was richer than most people because he failed more times than most. However, in his case, he learned from his mistakes and tried again. Why? Because he was confident that he could do what he wanted to do if he just continued trying. You are no different from Donald Trump. Do what he did. Just keep trying until you succeed. When you do, your self confidence will soar and you will realize that you can do anything you want to as long as you continue trying.
Another technique is to watch other people. When you see someone that stands upright and moves with a sense of purpose watch to see if they give you the impression that they have a lot of confidence. If they do, duplicate the physical characteristics of these confident people and you will start to gain the confidence they display.
One thing that you must ensure that you do not do is listen to people who talk down to you or try to tell you that you cannot do something. Usually these people can’t do these things themselves, so they try to convince others that they can’t do them either. If something like this keeps happening to you, tune these people out and stop associating with them. Your inner confidence needs to be liberated from this constant barrage of negative thoughts and statements from the dream stealers around you. Your limitations are in your mind, not in your reality.
Here are some tips for everyday practice. If you want to develop and build confidence, associate with positive uplifting people. Good people around you will help you build self confidence. If you want to build up your confidence, do something new every day. Each of these small acts will add to your confidence and also make your life more enjoyable. The most sacred thing in life is self confidence because it is the secret of all miracles. When you have confidence in yourself, you arouse everything that is stronger, greater and superior in you. In consequence, the more confidence you have in yourself, the more you will attain and accomplish. A person who knows the power of self confidence walks a path of inner growth and achievement. With self confidence a person of mediocre ability can achieve more in life than those with exceptional talents and little self confidence.
Supreme self confidence is a birth right for every person so isn’t it about time you claimed yours?
[Article by member of the Canadian Mounted Police – offered anonymously]